The best weekend in a long time…

This weekend was the best weekend I've had in a long time… I've been filled with so much sadness with memories of my dad that it's been hard to be happy… I was so sad to see this long weekend end.

Friday night my friend Lana treated me to my early birthday lunch at a great Japanese restaurant called Kasa Moto. Then on Saturday we just relaxed at home by having a barbecue in our backyard. On Sunday we went to church in the morning and then Kendall and I met with Auntie Jess and Uncle Wayne downtown to check out the Victorious Festival (a Christian festival with proceeds going to the Canadian Cancer Society). Daddy took you swimming so you guys didn't go with us. We tried to get halmi to go, but she just wanted to stay home :-(

Today (Civic Holiday), we went to Canada's Wonderland in the morning where we rode lots of big kid rides (the first time you were able to do so!) and then we went for a outdoor BBQ at Sunnybrook Park with Auntie Sara, Uncle Wayne, Auntie Jessica, Uncle Wayne, Emma, Noelle, halmi, Dan's mom, brother, Dan's SIL, Sophia and Isabelle. It was such a nice way to end the weekend. I just wish halbi was with us…

You riding the carousel. I realized that you were tall enough to ride a lot of the big kid rides. We ended up
riding Klockwerks, The Fly and Thunder Run. You had a blast!

Kendall stayed with daddy while mommy and you rode the big kid rides. Here she is doing the kimchi squat.

On our way to Sunnybrook Park, you guys passed out. Celebration!

It was supposed to rain today, but it turned out to be a gorgeous day. 

We didn't even have to bring any toys. All the kids had a blast running around. We must do it again!

Kendall was having so much fun. Here she is hopping towards me.

"Hi mommy!"

Uncle Wayne got all the kids (minus Noelle and Isabelle) to carry the mat to the car. You guys were being
good little helpers…

…but failed miserably #fail.

Graduation party

One of your classmates, Emily, invited the whole class for a graduation party at her house. Even your teacher, Ms Stamkos was able to make it. We presented her with a gift and flowers. I'm going to miss the class of 110.

Look how you're linking arms with your best friends- Avishai and Mateo. So sweet!

Aidan graduation

As I'm writing this, I'm filled with so many conflicted emotions- happiness, sadness and pride. It seems like yesterday that you came out of my womb and now, my baby is graduation from Senior Kindergarten… Where did the time go? I am so thankful for God that he gave me this year to be there for my dad and also for you and Kendall. How amazing is it that He restores all things? Praise be to God. I am so honoured that I got to share in this special moment with you. I love you!

The morning before I dropped you off at school. Don't you look handsome?

You and Kendall.

Kendall wanted a solo shot. 

The gymnasium was packed with parents. Daddy couldn't be here because he had to work, but I wish now
that he had taken it off. It was such a special day that I never want to forget. 

The graduation procession. You totally ignored me!

All the Senior Kindergarteners from your school that were graduating this year.

Singing O Canada.

Each of the classes had a performance that they did. This was your class's performance.

My handsome boy.

You made a self portrait of yourself.

Your favourite memory of Kindergarten.

Getting ready to accept your diploma.

You did it! You graduated Kindergarten! That is your teacher- Ms Stamkos and Ms Silverberg. 

The graduation slideshow of your class- Room 110.

You and your best friend at school- Mateo.

Another good friend of yours- Avishai.

You also love these girls- Amayah and Cailyn.

Here you are holding Cailyn's hand. What a guy!

You and mommy. I am so proud of you!

My little graduate. You are wearing daddy's white shirt backwards!

"Mommy, there's a mini grape growing out of our tree…"

Classic. 

This morning, before heading off to school, I was setting up the stroller on our driveway and you happened to be looking at our tree. The buds are starting to come out now and you kept picking at the tree. You called me over and said in a matter-of-fact voice that there were little grapes growing out of our tree. I told you they were tree buds, but you insisted that they were grapes. Haha. 

You are also beginning to demand more play dates with your classmates. Today, I picked you and your best friend,
Mateo up from school for a play date. It's actually pretty nice having your friends over because you guys play
very civilized and it gives mommy a breather. I noticed that having play dates with your school friends are
much less crazy than having play dates with your non school friends. I guess it's because you guys have a certain
way of playing at school with rules and boundaries so it's very interesting to watch.

"For the strong, silent type"

I have a weird obsession of loving watching kids eat french fries. I think it's the way their little hands hold the fries. Every time I watch you eating your fries when you are eating your Happy Meal, I pause and just stare. Am I a freak or what?

Maybe I started my obsession when I saw this 1987 McCain french fries commercial?

Today was Nate's birthday party. He turned 4 this year. We were invited for the celebration at 4pm so we decided to walk over. Too bad it poured as soon as we left the house and we got drenched!

Your cool rain gear outfit.

And guess who made a special appearance? Spiderman! 

Look how cute you guys are. I think you will be the best of friends when you are older.

Will you be my Valentine?

I couldn't sleep last night because of all the stuff that's been going on. I decided to take my mind off things by creating personalized Valentine's Cards for your school classmates. I used a template that I saw online (http://camillestyles.com/valentines-day/diy-printable-valentines/) and modified it. You aren't allowed to bring candy to school for some reason so I wanted to make special cards for all your friends at school. I printed the cards and left an area for your name blank so that I could get you to handwrite your name. 

Since the weather has been terrible this Winter, we've been staying home a lot. Today was another snow day- a perfect day to get you to write your name on the cards. 

I got you to write your name on 19 cards.

You knew how to read all 19 names of your friends on the outside of the cards. 

Here's how it looks like all folded up.

Another view.

So proud of his work.

Here's how one of the cards look.

And opened up.

And here's a video of you writing your name on all the cards.

Shock and heart break

It's been such an emotional roller coaster today.

It started off the way it usually starts on a Monday- hectic. I was trying to get you out of the house to drop you off at daycare and because I was running late and you were more clingy than usual, I was annoyed. I yelled at you right before I dropped you off at school.

I was at a photo shoot today for work and round 10:30am I got a call from your daycare. Anytime they call me, I get nervous. I guess it's because anytime they call me, it's to tell me that you got hurt. This time, they told me that you had fallen outside while at recess and your mouth was bleeding. Apparently you were going to your friend, Mateo, and I guess you tripped on the slide and smashed your face on the concrete. I asked the teacher that I was talking to on the phone to check your teeth to see if your teeth were okay. She told me that she didn't know because there was a lot of blood, but that you were okay and they were just icing your mouth. I just recall that the whole time that we were talking, the thing that struck me was just how calm the teacher was. I don't know if it's because she didn't know the extent of your injury or that she didn't want me to freak out. Because of how calm she was, I didn't know how badly injured you were. I told the teacher I would call back in an hour during my lunch break to check up on you again. When I called back, I asked them how you were doing and they said you were doing well and that you were eating eating (soup). I asked them to check your teeth again (I guess they didn't check it since I last spoke!) and they asked me, "Are Aidan's teeth crooked?" Immediately I said, "No!" I started panicking at this point because they were telling me that I might have to take you to the dentist. I told them I couldn't leave at that moment because I was in the middle of a shoot, but that I would come as soon as I could. Even then, I didn't hear a sense of worry from the teacher about your condition. Honestly, I didn't think your accident was that bad, judging from what they were telling me. When I was finally able to get away (around 3pm) I just rushed out of the shoot to go to you. It took me just over an hour to get to your daycare and when I ran in, you were sitting on a chair. The first thing I noticed was that you were talking with a lisp. I asked you to open your mouth and I was shocked! Your 2 front teeth were jammed in and one tooth was chipped. Tears started welling in my eyes and I just started dressing you right away to leave. I was so furious. The daycare teachers started surrounding me and saying that I had to take you to the dentist. And their voice sounded really concerned- totally different than what they were before. I just felt that they were judging me for coming so late. I mean, it was them that made the situation feel lighter than it actually was! Then one of the teacher started telling me that Aidan's boots were really worn out on the sole and that several times he was on the verge of falling. Why didn't they tell me this before??? I just felt that they were trying to direct the blame back onto me. I just wanted to get the hell out of there. When I got you into the car, I was frantically calling your pediatric dentist to see if they could see you ASAP, but they weren't picking up. I eventually called my dentist to see if he could see you. Luckily he was able to. When my dentist saw you, he said you were probably going to lose 2 of your front teeth, but he didn't want to pull it out in case your pediatric dentist could do something to possibly save the teeth. He got his receptionist to keep calling your pediatric dentist to get them to see you for tomorrow and eventually she was able to get through to them. We will be seeing your pediatric dentist tomorrow at 1:30pm. By the time you got home you were famished. My dentist told me to just give you soup and soft foods so I made a big pot of chicken noodle soup and you ate 3 servings! When daddy got home, he was so angry! I had wrapped the daycare teachers' presents the day before and he told me not to give it to them. 

This experience has been a total nightmare. I just feel sick to my stomach because I know if you were home with me, this would have never happened. I just feel guilty that I wasn't able to prevent this from happening and that I wasn't able to leave work to see you right away. I'm sorry I was mad at you this morning. I'm just so sorry. So sorry…

At my dentist waiting for the dentist to examine your injured teeth. Even through this whole ordeal,
you were a trooper. You didn't even cry and several times you asked me why I was crying.

You were so hungry when we got home from the dentist that you had 3 bowls of soup! You don't
normally have a huge appetite so this really saddened and shocked me.