I'm a tiger, hear me roar!

Dear Aidan,

Sorry for the lack of posts, but mommy's been so busy at work. My boss has been working me to the bone and I've been on shoots all week and last. Tomorrow and Friday I have 2 more shoots and then I'm done! Anyways, I came home pretty late- I got off the bus a little past 8pm. When I checked the mail (which I usually do on my way home) I got the item I ordered online a few weeks ago. It's your Halloween costume! I know I was saying earlier how I ordered a tiger costume for you to wear on Halloween so I've been eagerly waiting its arrival. Well, I'm safe to say it's just ADORABLE with a capital 'A'! I didn't have time to put the whole costume on you, but I did have time to put the headpiece on you. You were so cute! I'm so excited to put you in it and take pictures of you.

So long weekend!

Dear Aidan,

I can't believe how quickly this weekend passed. It just felt too short. I also didn't get to see much of you too this weekend. On Friday night I met up with Auntie Jess to do a sister shopping day. It was so nice to do something that didn't involve babies. Sorry Aidan! Yesterday mommy was doing freelance work in the morning and then in the evening daddy and I went to our friend, Do Yoon's wedding reception. We were planning to take you with us, but at the last minute we decided not too. It was a boat cruise downtown and we thought it was going to be too long of a day for you. We would basically be in the boat until midnight. Your Toronto grandparents were kind enough to look after you while we were gone. It was the first time we left you at night for that long with anyone so we were pretty nervous. But we didn't have anything to worry about. You were fine and I'm hoping to do that more! Well, I don't think daddy will be up for it. He's very protective of you. He was checking his phone all night to see if your Toronto grandparents would call.

Today I did more freelance work in the morning while daddy watched you and then I watched you all afternoon/night until daddy came back from soccer.

As for your new haircut, no one seems to be liking it. Your Toronto grandma and Vancouver grandma both commented how it's not as nice when you had longer hair. Hmm... both daddy and I thought it was pretty cute. We thought it made you look more tough. Whereas the longer hair made you look more 'pretty'.


Hair from front


Hair from side

You look rough

Dear Aidan,

You got your 2nd haircut ever today. Your hair was getting way too long. Now you look pretty rough and more like a boy. You were beginning to look too girly with your long hair. The amazing thing was you were absolutely a dream while you were getting your hair cut. You stayed absolutely still and you didn't even cry. It wasn't an easy cut because your hair was so long, but your hair stylist, Sean, did an amazing job. Now you will look really good at Do Yoon's reception on Saturday.

Your cough is still there and your voice is starting to turn hoarse, but I think you are a tad better than yesterday. You woke up at 5am last night crying because I think you had trouble breathing (because you were so congested). I'm hoping tonight you will sleep the whole night through.

Why, oh why?

Dear Aidan,

I'm so upset today. One of our friends is going through such a hard time. She is pregnant with her first baby and she's about 6 months along, but she has to terminate her baby. Her baby has a lot of problems and the doctors have told her that it would probably be best for her to terminate the baby. She has to make that decision before she is 24 weeks (which is next week), but she told me today that she is going to go through with the termination. I can't imagine how she is feeling right now. When she was explaining everything to me today I couldn't stop crying. We were both in tears because we were so sad that we couldn't do anything for her baby. We felt so helpless. Next week she is going in the hospital to do the procedure, but she was telling me that basically she has to go through labour and deliver the baby. I didn't know she had to do that. I mean, it's hard enough that you have to terminate the baby, but to actually deliver the baby and then arrange it's funeral???? It's not fair! All these things are running through my mind right now. How could such a joyous moment turn into such a nightmare.

Before I left her I asked her if it was ok if I touch her stomach. I wanted to say goodbye to the baby. I'm just so sad. I'm going to hold onto you a little more tightly tomorrow.

Above is a picture of you in mommy's stomach at 5 months. This would be around the same time that my friend is in in her pregnancy...

The calm after the storm

Dear Aidan,

So I sent your Vancouver grandma a bouquet of flowers today with a note saying, "Get well, we love you. Love Aidan, Dennis, and Stephanie". I wanted to make sure she knew I did the best I could. I was extending the olive branch because she obviously wasn't doing it. When I came home daddy asked me if I had sent flowers to his mom. I said yes. He said that he had spoken to her on the phone and she asked if he had sent her flowers. He didn't even know what she was talking about. Daddy is so clueless when it comes to things like this. I have yet to get flowers from daddy. It's not about wasting your money on something that will eventually die, but it's about making the person that receives the flowers feel special.

I think your Vancouver grandma felt guilty when she received the flowers. She called me tonight to explain why she was mad. At this point I don't really care. I know how she is now and now I know that I can't be totally myself around her. I have to watch whatever I do because if I don't it will eventually come back to bite me. She basically said that she wasn't upset about us not calling. She was more upset at the fact that we were computer literate and yet we didn't have the time to research online about her condition and what we could do to make it better. She was saying how her friends were telling her that there was a shingles specialist in Toronto, blah blah blah. You know what? I do care that she was sick and all, but I'm also taking care of you. You have been sick ever since you've been in daycare and honestly you come before her. I'm so tired coming home from work and I want to use up my energy taking care of you.

That's all I have to say.

Drama, drama, drama

Dear Aidan,

I'm just frustrated. I know I don't look it on the photo above, but I am. Because we didn't call your Vancouver grandma this week (well, we were planning to call her yesterday night) she is still mad at us. I called her again tonight when I got home and she didn't pick up. Your Vancouver grandpa called saying she was still mad and that she didn't want to talk to me. Sigh. I don't know what more to do. I'm thinking of sending her a bouquet of flowers tomorrow. Apparently she's made at your Auntie Jane too. Your daddy isn't happy with her, but I don't want him to get even more mad at her because it's going to make me look bad.

Your Vancouver grandma is usually really good to me, but when I'm not careful sometimes I get in trouble. Things that I wouldn't think are a big deal will come back to bite me. That's why I'm always on my toes when I'm around them. You never know...

Hopefully she's in a better mood tomorrow.

And we're back!

Dear Aidan,

What a busy weekend we had. We bought a new vacuum for the house (our old one broke) and we ordered new iron railings for the front porch yesterday. Today we went over to Pacific Mall to get contacts for daddy. While we were there we quickly grabbed lunch at the food court. I tried out your new booster chair that straps onto any chair. That way we can have a portable seat for you so we don't have to use the restaurant's high chairs (which can be pretty icky sometimes). Plus, next Saturday we have a wedding reception to attend to which is in a cruise boat. I'm not sure if they will have a high chair there so I wanted to purchase a booster chair just in case. Let me just say I love it! I love the fact that it's light weight and it fold up so that it is really easy to carry. Plus, I love the fact that it comes with a detachable tray. That way we can put food on it and it will keep you occupied for a good while. I hate scarfing down my food every time we go out to eat because you start getting restless.

I took some paparazzi photos of you and daddy while you guys were outside today. Daddy was babysitting you while mommy was doing freelance work this afternoon. I noticed you guys were outside for a while so I looked out the window to see what you guys were doing.


Daddy was holding you while he was watering our new grass that we laid down last week



Do you notice something? That's little Rosco peeking his head out onto our driveway. I think he was looking for daddy.

------

I know this post is all over the place, but since I missed a couple of days worth of posts I thought I would share with you some photos I took of you yesterday.


You love crawling underneath mommy and daddy's legs.



You kept going back-and-forth, under and over.



Here's daddy trying to give you a kiss. You looked stunned.



Curious Aidan is trying to touch daddy's laptop keyboard.



Enough playtime with Aidan. Good night!

...I just got off the phone with your Vancouver grandpa. There is a bit of drama happening in the Kim household. I'm not sure if I mentioned this in my other posts, but Your Vancouver grandma has been sick with shingles for the past few weeks. Instead of getting better she's been getting worse. I guess she was in a lot of pain this week and the fact that we didn't call her this weekend upset her even more. She called daddy while he was coming home from soccer to vent, but daddy didn't make things better. So she hung up the phone on him. Daddy came home and asked if I had spoken to her on the phone. I hadn't, because I just came back from your Toronto grandparents' house. I was planning to call them tonight, but I hadn't expected this to happen. Plus, I hadn't been sending any photos of you for a few days because I was so busy. When I tried calling their house nobody picked up. I knew she was really upset. I hate having people mad at me so I felt horrible. I sent her pics (pics of what I posted here) to her right away. A short while later I got a call from them, but it was your Vancouver grandpa. He was just explaining to me why she was upset. I think he was just trying to understand where we were coming from. He wasn't angry with us. He knew we were busy too, but he was saying your Vancouver grandma was so stressed out from not getting any better and she misses you so much. I'm planning to call her tomorrow to talk to her, but I'm just really frustrated. I always wonder if it were my parents were living away from us if they would act this way. I try to be so accommodating to them by sending them pictures of you almost every day and even talking to them on Skype, but when I miss some days it comes back to bite me. I come home around 6:40pm (that's the earliest I can come home during the weekday) and then I have to cook, clean-up and then play with you. Followed by giving you a bath, and putting you to bed. Daddy helps me do all these things, but remembering to take photos of you, downloading it to my computer, and then sending it to them every single night can be so draining. All I can say is I am not looking forward to tomorrow...

Trick or treat!

Dear Aidan,

You know what's coming up? Hallowe'en! A couple of weeks ago I happened to be at a mall and I saw some stores carrying costumes for kids already. I know how some people wait until the last minute and then all the good costumes are gone. Well, I don't want to be that person. Plus, I hope to take you trick or treating this year. Our neighbour has this crazy haunted house thing that he does every year so I definitely want to check that out. Plus, now that you can walk a little I think a little stroll around the block will be fine.

Anyways, I was looking at Hautelook this morning at 11am (that's when they post sales up every day) and they had Hallowe'en costumes for kids. Plus, they were super cute. I was debating between a lion, tiger, and monkey, but daddy convinced me to get the tiger. I knew that was what he was going to pick. My pick was the monkey. The tiger is still very cute. It's by InCharacter and the great thing about this costume is that the lower part of the costume snaps open for easy diaper changes. Plus, the booties are skid-resistant and slip-ons so you can always remove it if you want to. You'll look so cute in it. I can't wait to get it! I know your grandparents are just going to D-I-E when they see you in it.

Teenage Aidan?

Dear Aidan,

I usually ride the bus in the mornings to go to work. This morning I happened to be amongst a group of teenagers in the back of the bus. There's many schools around where we live so it's not surprising that I'm surrounded by teenagers. I'm always seeing how teens are these days and what they are interested in because I know someday I will have to deal with a teenage you. A few stops after I got on a teenage girl got on the bus. I guess she knew some of the boys in the bus so she started talking to one of them. She started saying, 'I wanted to kill my parents last night...' I guess she had fought with her parents so she was venting to one of the boys. She was going on how annoying they were, etc. etc. When I heard that my heart just broke. I started thinking, 'Will Aidan think of us that way when he is a teenager? Will he think we're annoying?' I don't remember hating my parents while I was a teenager, but then that was a long time ago. Then what shocked me even more was when all the teenagers got off the bus, almost 90% of them took out cigarettes in their bags and started smoking. Sigh.

For now, I'll worry about you being super needy and wanting to always be held by me. I'm fine with that.

Richmond Court

Dear Aidan,

These pics were taken of you when we went for dinner at Richmond Court. Lately we've been eating out a lot. I guess the good thing about that is it will get you used to eating in public spaces. You're so used to eating at home or at daycare. Although it's so hard getting you to sit still and be quiet you are getting better at it. We just make sure we have everything- milk, rice rusk snacks, Cheerios, yogurt, cheese, you name it!

Always up to no good

Dear Aidan,

I'm not sure who your personality is more like- mommy or daddy's. You have this mischievous side of you (gae gool jang ee in Korean) that is so unlike both mommy and daddy. Today you were playing a game with mommy that made you laugh so hard. You were in your playpen and you started getting pretty restless in there. I put my foot up on the playpen so that it faced your face. You grabbed my foot and pushed it over! Then you laughed uncontrollably. You laughed even harder when I pretended that it hurt.

Lately you've been quite the Curious George. I guess now that you can walk you want to go everywhere and touch everything. Both daddy and I have to watch you like a hawk. When we give you free reign to walk upstairs you immediately head to our washroom. You seem to love the faucets on our bathtub as well as the draw strings on the window blinds.


You love to turn the knobs on the hot and cold water knobs.



Or pulling on the strings of the window blinds. The good thing is everything you touch for the first time you do with caution. If I say, 'no!' then you start to withdraw.



This was exactly what I was doing. I was saying, 'no!' when you were touching the strings of the window blinds. You then started coming over to where I was.



What a good boy you are!

Human sponge

Dear Aidan,

I'm so amazed how quickly you are picking things up now. Now you are able to copy everything that we do. Remember how I was saying yesterday that I was trying to teach you what'bbo bbo'meant? Well, you already picked it up. Daddy was showing me when I got home from work that when we say 'bbo bbo' now you come over and open your mouth as if about to kiss. Well, it's more of a French kiss, but still... Plus, I taught you a couple more things today. When I clap and say 'jjak jjak goong, jjak jjak goon' (in Korean it means clap, clap) you start copying me. I also taught you to put the back of your hand to your mouth and start moving it back and forth while blowing and making sound. I know it's hard to visualize, but I took a few snapshots of you doing that. You just loved it!

Kick, kick!

Dear Aidan,

You seem to understand what we tell you now. Now you know to wave when we say bye bye. You also know that kick means kick the ball. Today daddy was showing me how you can kick the ball now. When he started saying, 'kick, kick!' you immediately got up and looked for your mini soccer ball. Then you kicked it. I was lucky that I was able to capture a video of you doing exactly that when I shouted, 'kick!' Next thing I'm trying to teach is 'Bbo bbo' which means kiss in Korean. You already know what hug means. When we say hug you run over to us and give us a big hug. Awwwww...



Lately I've been seeing a lot of kids in the bus/subway while I'm going to work and coming home from work. Maybe it's because the school year has commenced, but every time I see a kid around your age I start thinking about you a lot. Today as I was walking to the subway on my way home I saw a little boy holding his father's hand. It's uncommon to see a boy your age on Bloor Street where I work because everyone there are professionals. Well, this boy was walking so carefully on Bloor and he was enjoying every step that he was taking. The little boy was so out-of-place where everyone was just rushing to get somewhere. It was so cute! It just reminded me of you right now at this age because you are just fascinated about everything. I just wanted to run home and give you a hug. I can't wait to take you out on day trips so that I can watch you do stuff like this.

My future hockey star

Dear Aidan,

What a night we had last night. You are so sick with ANOTHER cold. This time you are coughing a lot and you are really congested. You woke up crying from coughing last night. Daddy went to bring you over to our bed so that we could all sleep together. We thought that you would go to sleep right away. Boy, were we wrong. You were tossing for 2 hours straight. Daddy tried holding you and then putting you down, but it didn't work. We also tried changing your diaper and vacuuming your nose, but that didn't work either. Eventually I had to get up and feed you milk then rock you to sleep. I couldn't put you down in our bed because I just figured that you would be tossing and turning again. So I put you back in your crib. That did the trick. Both mommy and daddy were total zombies when we woke up at 6:25am. We got 3 hours of sleep. Sigh.

Now mommy is sick. I had to go to a walk-in clinic near my work to get a prescription for my swollen throat. The doctor told me I should drink lots of fluid and get lots of rest. I wish!

Even with all this lack of sleep you were looking a lot better today. You played well when mommy came home. Daddy was trying to teach you how to handle a hockey stick. Of course, it wasn't a real hockey stick, but just your little plastic one. You were so enamored with the ball.

We also taught you to wave bye bye today. Mommy was getting ready to go upstairs to put you to sleep, and daddy was waving bye bye to you. Daddy asked me to wave your hands so that you understood what that meant. Just then, you started waving your arms by yourself. It was so cute!

Well, I'm heading to bed now. Hopefully I can get sleep tonight.

Dinner party

Dear Aidan,

We came home pretty late last night so I didn't have a chance to post pictures I took yesterday at Do Yoon's house. Daddy's friend, Do Yoon, was hosting a dinner party at his house with his wife, Suran. It was us and Suran's friend, Hyun Jung & her husband, Daniel. Do Yoon is really into cooking so he prepared a wonderful meal for us. He made mushrooms stuffed with spicy crab, salmon steak, and rack of lamb. Mommy made hae pari naeng chae, which is a Korean jellyfish salad and Hyun Jung and her husband made walnut and cranberry salad and a cheese platter with prosciutto. It was a delicious dinner and it felt nice doing something like that. We haven't done a nice dinner party in a while. Daddy and I really enjoy eating, but ever since we had you we have to scarf down our food at restaurants so that one of us can look after you.


This was your outfit. You're wearing a jacket that Do Yoon bought for you in Korea that you got on your birthday. The jeans are Mexx jeans that mommy got for you, and the shoes are from Auntie Sara.



The table setting. I was drooling looking at all the food. Daddy, not so much. He was still recovering from his food poisoning incident so he didn't eat that much. Guy missed out!



Close-up shot.



Mommy's hae pari naeng chae. It took me forever to prepare/make, but it was so good. I got the recipe from your Toronto grandma. All the guest's loved it too. There was nothing left by the end of the night.



The salad. It was really delicious as well. I forgot to take photos of Do Yoon's mushroom, salmon, and lamb, but that's because you were a handful that night.



You look so good, but...



You were so needy. Daddy and I had to hold you most of the night because you cried every time we put you down. You just wanted to be held. It was hard...